Embracing Positive Thinking: A Path to Resilience and Joy
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In today's world, where positive thinking is often dismissed as naive, while negativity prevails in media and daily conversations, it is no surprise that mental health concerns, including depression and anxiety, are rising.
We live in a society that tends to glorify negativity.
Every day presents us with hurdles, and sharing our troubles endlessly, particularly on social media, rarely leads to resolution or relief. This fixation on our challenges often deepens our distress rather than alleviating it.
I'm not advocating for the suppression of negative feelings. It's essential to confront unpleasant situations and emotions. However, we are not meant to dwell in negativity without respite.
Cultivating positivity can enhance our mental, physical, and spiritual well-being. Individuals who embrace positive thoughts and emotions generally experience greater happiness, health, and success, making it a worthwhile pursuit in our everyday lives.
If negativity is undesirable, why do we often gravitate toward it?
Some argue that negativity is an instinctive reaction to life's challenges. While we cannot control every circumstance we face, we do have the power to choose our reactions. Though this notion may seem clichéd, let me clarify.
When I emphasize the idea of choosing our responses, it may suggest a conscious decision-making process. Too frequently, we react unconsciously rather than responding with intention. Our preconceived notions and expectations can cloud our judgment. We often experience negative emotions when people or situations do not align with our expectations, as our "shoulds" influence our perception of reality.
We are not born with negativity or judgment; these tendencies are learned through our interactions and observations. Well-meaning figures in our lives, such as parents, teachers, and religious leaders, may inadvertently shape our beliefs, values, and expectations in ways that foster a pessimistic outlook. They often convey that work and relationships are inherently difficult, and that trust is scarce, contributing to a loss of childlike wonder as we mature.
Furthermore, media outlets amplify negative narratives. Advertisers exploit our fears of missing out to sell us unnecessary products, and popular shows depict a world rife with conflict and danger, skewing our perception of reality.
Negativity can be enticing, easily capturing our attention. We often accept negative viewpoints as truths without question, allowing this mindset to affect our overall well-being. Why do we invest in negativity, especially when it detracts from our happiness?
Research indicates that we are predisposed to a negativity bias, focusing on potential problems and fears of loss. While this instinct may have roots in our evolutionary past, it is not particularly uplifting, especially in a world where threats are less immediate.
Although negative experiences may resonate more strongly, the good in our lives far outweighs the bad. Most of us enjoy basic comforts such as shelter, food, employment, meaningful relationships, health, and safety. By shifting our focus from negative to positive, we can begin to recognize and appreciate the abundance around us.
While it's important to remain aware of negative influences, we shouldn't be preoccupied with potential problems. Persistent worry is unhealthy, and stress poses a greater threat to our well-being than many other factors.
Another source of negativity can be the individuals we interact with. Being around pessimistic individuals can foster similar emotions in us. Researchers Hatfield, Cacioppo, and Rapson describe "emotional contagion," the unconscious tendency to mimic the emotions and expressions of those around us, leading to shared feelings.
Our brains possess mirror neurons that allow us to empathize with others, sensing their feelings and physical sensations. This connection can foster bonds, especially in infants.
Benefits of Positive Emotions
In her book Positivity, Fredrickson (2009) posits that positive emotions "broaden people's ideas about possible actions, opening our awareness to a wider range of thoughts and actions." They enhance our receptiveness and creativity. By aiming for a positivity ratio of at least three to one—three positive experiences for every negative one—we can thrive rather than merely exist.
Positive emotions not only expand our perspectives but also contribute to our success. Shawn Achor (2010), in The Happiness Advantage, compiles evidence showing that happy individuals demonstrate higher productivity, achieve better sales, excel in leadership, and garner higher pay and job security. They are less likely to take sick days, leave jobs, or experience burnout. Happy leaders tend to foster positive work environments that enhance performance.
Moreover,
Data indicates that happiness correlates with better outcomes across various domains. For instance, doctors in a positive mood demonstrate nearly three times more intelligence and creativity, making accurate diagnoses 19% faster than those in neutral states. Optimistic salespeople outperform their pessimistic counterparts by 56%. Students primed for happiness excel in assessments compared to their neutral peers. This suggests our brains function optimally when in a positive state, rather than when negative or neutral.
According to Lyubomirsky, King, and Diener,
Happier individuals enjoy more stable relationships, stronger immune systems, higher incomes, and greater creativity than their less happy counterparts.
Given the myriad benefits of positive emotions, cultivating them in our lives is undoubtedly valuable.
Strategies to Enhance Positivity and Mitigate Negativity
Martin Seligman, a key figure in the positive psychology movement, found notable distinctions in how positive and negative thinkers interpret their experiences. In Learned Optimism: How to Change your Mind and Your Life, Seligman elaborates on explanatory styles. Negative thinkers often view adverse events as permanent, universal, and personal, while interpreting positive occurrences as temporary, specific, and external. Conversely, optimistic individuals see negative events as temporary, specific, and external, and positive events as permanent, universal, and internal.
Examples of Interpretations:
Negative thinker’s view on a negative event: - "I will always be stuck in this job (permanent)." - "All jobs are terrible (universal)." - "I’m such a failure (personal)."
Negative thinker’s perspective on a positive event: - "My new job is better, but I’m sure it won't last (temporary)." - "I’m only good at one thing (specific)." - "I just got lucky (external)."
Optimistic thinker’s interpretation of a negative event: - "I was furloughed, but I’ll find another job (temporary)." - "That job was a waste of time (specific)." - "The company was poorly managed (external)."
Optimistic thinker’s view on a positive event: - "I am capable of finding great opportunities (permanent)." - "There are always good jobs available (universal)." - "My skills will guide me to a desired position (personal)."
By examining our thoughts and language, we can identify patterns and work toward a more empowering interpretation of events.
Building on the previous discussion about emotional contagion and mirror neurons, it is beneficial to surround ourselves with positive individuals who uplift us. By being positive ourselves, we can also positively influence those around us. If negative people are present in our lives, we should minimize our interactions and strive to avoid mirroring their negativity. While some of this may occur unconsciously, we can consciously choose to engage or disengage to limit negative impacts.
We should also be mindful of the media we consume. By paying attention to our emotions while engaging with television, social media, or online content, we can determine whether these activities contribute to our positivity or negativity.
Simple lifestyle changes—like maintaining a healthy diet, exercising, practicing mindfulness, and ensuring adequate sleep—can enhance our physical and mental well-being, leading to improved mood. When we feel strong and alert, engaging with the world becomes easier.
To bolster positivity, we can consciously adopt an appreciative perspective, seeking out the positives rather than fixating on negatives. By savoring good experiences, we can cultivate a habit of noticing and embracing them. We can also prime ourselves for positivity by engaging in activities that uplift us, such as watching motivational content or reading inspiring literature at the start and end of our days.
Instead of dwelling on complaints or negative narratives, we should strive to reframe our stories. Avoid lingering on past negative experiences; take charge of your narrative and view challenges as opportunities for growth, resilience, and wisdom. If negative feelings persist regarding past events or circumstances beyond your control, focus on resolving them through forgiveness, surrender, or letting go.
If negativity, depression, or anxiety becomes overwhelming, seeking guidance from a trusted counselor can be beneficial. Rather than viewing it as a weakness, see it as an opportunity for personal development.
While numerous factors may encourage negative feelings, many more exist that can foster positivity. The goal is not to change the world or our circumstances, although those are commendable ambitions. Instead, it's about shifting our focus. With every choice, we either invest in positive or negative emotions. Where are you directing your energy?