What Time Management Is and Isn’t

The term “time management” can be misleading. It's often said that we cannot actually manage time itself; it simply flows by. Time marches on through days and weeks regardless of our actions during those moments.

What we need to focus on is ourselves. To truly make the most of the time we have, effective self-management is essential.

So, what does it mean to manage ourselves effectively? This article will explore that question. However, it's important to note that understanding effective personal time management is just the beginning.

Putting that knowledge into action and maintaining consistency is significantly more challenging. Yet, that’s where the real value lies, and that’s what we will delve into here.

Choosing Your Tasks

Surely, deciding which tasks to tackle each day seems straightforward, right? Unfortunately, it’s not that simple.

We often lack objectivity when selecting our daily tasks, leaning toward those that seem easiest, most familiar, or most requested by others. You may recognize this pattern, especially the last point.

If this has been your method of task selection and you still feel overwhelmed, it’s likely not working for you.

As a result, you might feel frazzled, dissatisfied, and unfulfilled.

Tackling this issue can be tough, as real change requires introspection rather than searching for outside reasons. You’ll also need to alter behaviors that may feel uncomfortable, possibly upsetting those who prefer your old ways.

What Are You Resisting?

This question greatly impacts your ability to manage both yourself and your time. Often, the things we resist are precisely what hold us back.

Most of us live two lives: the one we lead and the one we yearn for, separated by Resistance. — Steven Pressfield

By confronting your resistance and pushing through it, you can make significant progress, leading to greater happiness, self-esteem, and confidence.

This may sound bold, but the only way to find out if it's true is to try it out.

Let’s examine four reasons you might be resisting a task and how to address them.

You Don’t Know How To Do It

Question: Did you attend school? I know this sounds simplistic, but seriously—school was where you learned everything necessary to build a career and contribute to society.

You were never expected to have all the answers before starting each new class or school year. Instead, the focus was on learning and absorbing knowledge.

So, why do you now feel resistance toward acquiring a new skill? Only you can answer that, but here are a few possibilities:

• You believe you should already know everything—really?
• You had a negative learning experience in the past that made you hesitant. But that was ages ago. You've grown since then.
• You feel pressed for time—more on this later.

Take the time to understand your thought process, but don’t let it stall your progress!

Instead, embrace the opportunity to learn, just as you would for a child. Your brain thrives on learning when given the chance. Treat it like a job requirement; set aside the time and enjoy the journey.

You’d Rather Be or Need To Be Doing Something Else

Ah, wouldn't we all like that?

There will always be distractions. Some are enjoyable hobbies we rarely allow ourselves to indulge in (that's a topic for another time).

Chances are, the task you’d prefer to do is something familiar and easy for you—like cleaning or tidying up.

Once you complete those tasks, more will inevitably follow, because, as you know, these tasks are merely distractions from what you should be doing.

You might be telling yourself that you can’t afford to neglect these basic tasks, but is that really true?

Probably not. Sure, things might get a bit chaotic for a while, but real damage? Likely not. Remember a time when you were unwell and couldn’t manage your usual tasks? Did everything fall apart? Probably not.

This all circles back to effective self-management, which will eventually lead to better time management.

My solution for resisting low-priority tasks over important ones? I set a cutoff time every day.

I maintain a list of routine tasks that keep things running smoothly. Once my time is up, I switch to focusing on the important work.

This approach brings me peace, knowing that routine tasks won’t interrupt my focus for a few hours. Give it a try; it may not be easy at first, but it’s an effective self-management technique.

You Think It’ll Take Too Much Time

Ask yourself: Am I going to do this task or not? Your answer should be a clear YES or NO—nothing more!

No overthinking or analyzing. Is it a YES or NO?

If you answered No, drop it from your list and move on. Don’t dwell on it again.

However, if you answered Yes, let’s be honest: when you do tackle this task, the time it takes becomes less relevant because you're committed.

If you’re still stalling, then the time factor isn’t your real issue; it’s likely one of the other resistance reasons discussed earlier.

If your concern is about the time required—like feeling you need an entire day to understand it or fearing it will consume months of your life—then it’s time to adjust your perspective!

Consider this:

No one has large blocks of free time—unless they’re on a beach!

You need to make the most of the available time slots. This goes back to self-management. Choose a time—starting with just five minutes if necessary—and stick to it.

No excuses, just commit and do it.

Keep this process going, gradually increasing the time you dedicate. The more you accomplish, the more motivated you’ll become, and you’ll find the time you need. Give it a shot.

The Time Will Pass Anyway

When did you first add this task to your to-do list? Was it hours, days, weeks, or even months ago?

If you had started working on it earlier, wouldn’t you have made at least some progress by now?

Exactly.

Other People Are Demanding Your Time

As I write this, my phone just pinged. Sound familiar? I could choose to ignore it (for now, since I’m busy), but these minor interruptions can easily distract us.

And that’s just a simple notification. There are larger demands for our time too. At home, your children might need you, your partner wants to spend time together, the dog needs walking, and the phone keeps ringing.

Work is no different; just replace family with colleagues, and you get the same picture.

Certain people have the "right" to interrupt you at times—your boss, your spouse, or your kids. But unless there’s an emergency, no one has the right to disrupt you constantly.

So, how interruptible are you?

• Do you use interruptions as an excuse to avoid tasks? Does a small disruption allow you to abandon your focus for the day?
• Or perhaps you hesitate to dismiss minor interruptions for fear of offending someone? This is a boundary issue that impacts many aspects of your life, not just your time management challenges.

People will interrupt you only to the extent that they expect a response.

If you regularly ignore them, they’ll stop bothering you, seeking attention elsewhere.

This illustrates that the issue lies in self-management (resistance), not time management.

Conclusion

I won’t pretend that improving your time management by addressing your resistance is easy; it's not.

This journey demands daily effort to scrutinize your habits and understand how they influence your life and aspirations.

However, like any improvement, self-awareness is invaluable and serves as the foundation for meaningful change.

Once you identify the root of your resistance, don’t waste more time criticizing yourself. Instead, seek support through self-help resources, courses, an accountability partner, or a coach to help you transition and achieve your goals.